Sunday, November 6, 2011

What kind of girl am I?

I am a woman. I do not think of myself as a Transsexual. Nor do I wish to have SRS. I like my male life, but given a choice I would rather live as a woman. I would like to spend 30-40% of my free time as Candice. I have a number of understanding and very supportive female friends. I am very thankful for them and the love and kindness they give to me. I actively go out in the "straight" world dressed with them. on average once a week, sometimes more. This past Thursday four of us went to a upscale wine bar for ladies night. While I am not perfect and may not be as stunning as some of the gurls out there. I am comfortable as Candice and I dress like a classy 48 year old professional lady should. So I blend well. 95% of the time, no one gives me a second look and if they do no one has cared to make a issue of it.

I also study women at large. Watching what the woman on the street is not only wearing but how. Shoes, style of jeans, bags, hair etc... Its the small details, the little touches that really make up a feminine image. I read womens magazines. All kinds from Glamor and In Style to Redbook and Ladies Home Journal to workout magazines like Women's Health and Oxygen. I read fashion and style blogs and various websites addressing women's interests and issues.

As a side note my girlfriends see me as two people and want to spend time with both sides of me. All love having Candice as a friend and treat her as another woman. Even how my girlfriends talk to me varies as to whether I am male or female. I even have them actively ask to go out with Candice to spend time with her. I am truly blessed with good friends.

There is a very supportive and friendly TG community in my city and I also have opportunities to meet up with some of my sisters to enjoy a few cocktails and a drag show now and then. 

A great book to read is Out & About - The Emancipated Cross dresser by Lacey Leigh. A realistic look at the challenges and joys of getting out as your feminine self. It has good solid tips and information to help you be the best woman you can. Reading this book helped me explore the outside world as Candice.

As for my love life I am single but I make it a point to share Candice with any woman who I become involved with. I have never had it become a "deal breaker". But to that, I also look for women who have a open minded personality that I feel would be open to Candice.

The "line in the sand" I am two people. Two genders. One body. At any moment I am one of them. by that I mean I don't wear panties or hose under my male clothing during the day or lingerie under a suit. I don't cross-cross dress. I am either dressed as Candice or as my male self. I am one or the other. When home I strip off my male attire. After a shower and the required shaving and grooming. I dress as Candice. I wear heels around the house to stay in practice and go about what I need to do as female.

So in a nutshell I am a very lucky and blessed middle aged classy lady who loves being a woman and has loving supportive friends. Who is out and about in the "straight world"trying to look for balance in her world.

Thank you.

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